Today is Madi's 2 month birthday. So, to celebrate, I take her to the doctor and she has to get shots. I am so mean!! But she did really well. She cried a little and she has been a little fussy but she has been sleeping it off most of the afternoon. She is 9 lbs. 5 oz. and 21 in. long. She is only in the 10th and 5th percentile for weight and height. The nurse said she is going to be a dainty little girl. Never imagined anyone would say that about a child of mine! HaHa. But she is healthy and the doctor said she is growing just fine.

Not a lot going on around our house. It was so hot last week, 105+ everyday, that we didn't do anything or go anywhere. We had a nice break in the temps on Friday and Saturday and was able to get some things done.

Here are my thoughts this week. Sunday night I was up late with Madi and this is always when I have my deep thoughts and plan out the next day. You know, sitting in the dark at 1:00 in the morning while feeding my daughter, typical time to start thinking. It doesn't really help the getting back to sleep part though. But here it is. There is a commercial on tv for a new show, don't know what it is. But this woman says, "True love is when you hug someone and you still don't feel like you can get close enough to them." I have had this feeling so much in the last 2 months and then I hear this woman describe it perfectly. This is especially true after I have spent some time away from Madi, nap time, in the morning, etc. I pick her up and hug her and she snuggles into my shoulder and I love her so much, I feel like I need to squeeze her harder. But she can't get any closer to me. I never thought I could love someone more than I already love my husband and my parents. And then I have this precious baby and I feel even more love than I ever have. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband. But it feels like a different love for Madi. She is all mine and I don't have to share her with anyone if I don't want to. And then I think, is it because we tried to have a baby for so long and got past the heartache of losing other babies and finally have this miracle with us. Do I love her more because we truly wanted a child at this moment in our lives and she wasn't a surprise or a mistake or someone to get used to being around? Has anyone else felt this or am I spending too much time alone?

My second realization is that I have so much patience with her that I never knew I had. I never dreamed that I would be able to take care of a baby, a house, get supper ready, clean and then still want to spend every second I have giving her my undivided attention. All this after only getting 4 hours of sleep the night before and not feeling well myself. (Which is what has been going on for the last week. I have an ear infection and I finally broke down and went to the doctor yesterday.) Anyways. I have amazed myself and I feel really good about myself and the job I have done so far. I just hope I have given enough attention to everybody else around me (Chris) and haven't hurt any feelings.

Love, Amy

Thanks for all the comments. It is a lot of fun reading the comments and reading others blogs. It is a typical lazy Sunday around our house. We nap all morning, wake up and watch Nascar coverage and get through about half the race before we take another nap. And then wake up to see the last of the race. GO JR!!!

We left Madi for the first time all night Friday. I thought I would be a nervous wreck but it turned out not to be so bad. It helped that it wouldn't have been a good idea to take her with us to begin with. That made it easier. Chris and I left town Friday afternoon around 2:30 pm and headed to Springfield, MO. They have a once a year tool sale there at the Grizzly Tool Company. People were standing in line at 2:00 am for the doors to open at 8:00 am. We got there at 7:15 am and the line was already the length of two sides of the building. It was hot and there was no wind and there were a lot of hot stinky bodies. But Chris got the tools he wanted and he can make even prettier furniture now. And it gave us a chance to get away.

I forgot to tell you in my last post but Madi is starting to smile and respond to people talking and their faces. She still isn't consistent and still sometimes lays there and gives you a scowl like you are the weirdest person. It is really cute though! She is also lifting her head more and really pushing back when she is up on your shoulder and trying to look around. She's still a little wobbly but she is really working on it.

I have to get back to my race. Hope everyone had a wonderful weekend.

Love, Amy

Well, it's official.....I am now a stay at home mommy!!!! I am so excited. The last seven weeks have flown by and I could only imagine how fast things and Madi would change if I were working full time and only getting to spend several hours with her in the evening. It would be dreadful.

First of all, I had these thoughts when I was pregnant of what life would be these eight weeks while being on maternity leave. I thought I would get so much done around the house that I have been neglecting. Let me tell you, I have accomplished one thing on my to do list. And that came with the help of Chris and my mom and it took a whole weekend. But we did manage to finally get our storage room downstairs organized and the garage cleaned out.

I tell you what, my images of having Madi around the house and real life are totally different. Nothing bad or anything I can't handle, but it is tough work sometimes. I don't think any amount of babysitting or watching friends and family raise their kids can prepare you for raising your own. At first all she did was sleep and wake enough to tell me she was hungry and then fall back to sleep. Which was itself a learning experience. I had to learn to sleep for only two hours at a time and not fall asleep while feeding her. I also had to learn to sleep during the day when she slept or I was not a very happy person by 7:00 pm. Sorry Chris! And with her eating every three hours I was not getting much done during the day.

But now...she has started to sleep all night which is wonderful!! Two weeks ago we finally got it figured out. She eats at 8:30 pm, I change her and get her ready for bed, I rock her to sleep, put her down at 10:00 and she would wake up once around 3:00 am. Give her another bottle and she would sleep until 7:30 or 8:00 am. That was nice, I could get used to only getting up once a night, I was thrilled. But then this last week we changed again. I can now give her a bottle around 9:00 pm, rock her to sleep, put her down around 10:30 and she sleeps until 6:30 am!!! The first night this happened and I woke up and looked at the clock I thought she had died. Something terrible was wrong, why hasn't she woke up yet. I went in to check on her and all was well. So far the all night sleeping is working. She then takes a nap in the morning for awhile and then takes a nap in the afternoon.

The new hurdle to get over is to get her to fall asleep and stay asleep with out me holding her. I know, I did this to myself. I have spoiled her already and now I have to figure out how to reverse it. So, I am now still holding her until she falls asleep during the day but I am laying her down after she has been asleep for 20 minutes and seeing how she does. Yesterday she did really good. She stayed asleep after laying her down and slept for a good hour and a half. Now today, within 10-15 minutes she is waking up. But I am waiting until she really starts crying before going in and getting her. Hoping she will fall back to sleep on her own. It's a work in progress but I have already learned with a newborn baby, every week and sometimes everyday things change. She is constantly changing her routine and the way she does things. And that was the biggest motivator for me to want to stay home. I can now experience it and share it with her everyday and it is going to be alot of fun, I'll keep you posted.

Love, Amy and Madi


My Sleeping Beauty